The Korean company loses all prepaid funds; a website wants to brute-force crack Satoshi Nakamoto's wallet; Shih Yongxin's bracelet is engraved with a mnemonic?
Written by: Nicky, Foresight News
Welcome back to "Spicy Comments," where we observe the dark humor of Web3’s "theoretically profitable, but actually suffering huge losses" phenomena every week.
A Korean company took clients' prepaid funds to buy 2x leveraged investments, while some are daydreaming about "theoretically making 80 billion," and Shih Yongxin wrote down a mnemonic on a bracelet. "Spicy Comments" will show you everything at once!
Koreans handed their funeral funds to a company, only to have them gamble with Ethereum
The most outrageous news recently comes from a Korean pre-paid funeral company called "Parents' Love."
The business model is quite simple: you pay a sum of money each month, and the company promises to handle all funeral arrangements when you pass away. In simple terms, living people are making installment payments for their after-life arrangements.
The company has large sums of prepaid funds sitting on its books, so they considered wealth management. The problem is, you're using the public's funeral funds to speculate on cryptocurrencies, leveraging them at that?
They chose the US stock BMNR (Bitmine Immersion Technologies, Inc., currently the largest Ethereum treasury company in the US market) and decided to go long 2x.
The audit report shows: the purchase cost was 59.5 billion won, but by the report date, only 10.2 billion won remained, a direct evaporation of 49.3 billion won (approximately 260 million RMB). The current ETH price is 1,666 USD, having dropped more than 40% this year.
The company's annual revenue is only 6 billion won, meaning this loss is equivalent to 8 years of hard work. What's worse is that every penny of this money is the pre-saved funeral expenses of the Korean people.
The Korean Economic Daily bluntly stated: "Even if you cancel the contract, there's no money to refund you."
Netizens comment: "I thought it would be peaceful in death, but the company helped you 'enter the earth' first."
"Ethereum can really lose your funeral funds — in a literal sense."
Korean netizens commented: Don't think about the word "conscience" in Korea🥹.
Treating other people's hard-earned money as one's own "capital"🫢.
Korean netizens stated that this incident has even been known abroad.
Embarrassment has reached the Chinese-speaking world😂.
It turns out the opponent is something you wouldn't even think of!
Having a construction company opening a sushi restaurant seems much more reasonable; at least they can build their own houses🤔.
Ethereum owes everyone an apology😔.
They buried themselves with leverage.
This website can theoretically make 80 billion!
Someone posted in the Reddit CryptoCurrency section:
"Strictly speaking, my website can make me 80 billion USD. Although it's practically impossible, theoretically it can, as it's trying to brute-force crack Satoshi Nakamoto's wallet."
This sums up how many crypto enthusiasts daydream: Satoshi Nakamoto's million bitcoins are right there, as long as you can guess the private key.
Netizens commented: "Bro, when you get the bitcoins, share some with us. Don't forget your roots on Reddit…"
Comments replied: "I will never betray my old friends, each of you will get 1 satoshi (1 bitcoin = 100 million satoshis = 0.00078 USD)."
Comments included a "tutorial": I have something similar running on my home cluster. I wrote a Go language script that generates a private key and then tries addresses of the top ten thousand bitcoin wallets, running forever. It's like a mini-lottery; I occasionally check the logs to see if I won. Much cheaper than a real lottery.😎
However, someone in the comments pointed out: "But Satoshi doesn't have a (single) wallet; he sent 50 coins to random addresses. So even if you guess one of those addresses, you can only access a wallet containing 50 coins."
So you can't suddenly get 80 billion anymore🫣.
Netizens commented: "If you actually succeed, then the value of those bitcoins will likely drop significantly."
Comments replied: "Yeah, then it’s only 70 billion USD left, right?😜
Someone who used the original poster's website said: "Interesting, but OP, could you add a 'Start' button🔘? As soon as I opened the website, my 16-core processor mysteriously started running at full speed, which isn’t good🤣 (Are you secretly using it for mining?)
Netizens said: "Great job on the website, buddy; it's very beautiful! I also like the 'preview winning screen' feature, since in reality no one can see that screen😂.
I previously ran a GPU-based decryption tool targeting all Satoshi's wallets, guessing tens of millions to hundreds of millions of times per second. But even then, the time scale approaches cosmic heat death.
But like you said… who knows? A random throw, and maybe you’ll get Yahtzee!
Netizens commented: The core meaning of proof-of-work is that the bitcoins you can earn for contributing to the network (mining) are far more than attacking the network (like trying to guess wallet private keys).
Netizens said: "When you say 'let you earn', you mean 'help you steal a large sum of money.' Just because you have access to someone's wealth doesn't mean you can legally take it."
Friendly reminder: The public key in the genesis block was randomly assigned by Satoshi manually. You'll never crack it.
Which one do you want to crack?🧐
Shih Yongxin's "bracelet engraved with mnemonic?"
On May 29, the Xinxiang Court of Henan Province ruled in the first instance: Former abbot of Shaolin Temple, Shih Yongxin (real name Liu Yingcheng), was found guilty of four crimes: occupation of duty, misappropriation of funds, bribery, and accepting bribes, receiving a combined sentence of 24 years in prison and a fine of 3.5 million yuan.
What really got a lot of people riled up was an unverified rumor (but circulating widely): investigators found a string of prayer beads at Shih Yongxin’s residence, each bead engraved with an English word, which together formed a complete mnemonic (seed phrase), corresponding to a bitcoin cold wallet containing approximately 130 million USD in BTC; there was also a USB drive containing the private keys of 18 Ethereum wallets, with assets exceeding 10 million USD.🫢
Netizens quickly flooded the comments: "The abbot says monks don't lie, but they can trade crypto."
The master turns out to be a "stock master"!
Smart from the beginning, right?
With the bracelet in hand, one holds more than 100 million USD!
And it can be carried around; it looks nice🧐.
Mercedes.
Seems to truly be ahead of its time.
When will Shaolin's public blockchain be released?🤣
Turns out the abbot has also studied Bitcoin.
Shaolin Temple NFT? From the funeral company losing all the funeral funds to the "theoretically making 80 billion" website, to the bracelet worth over 100 million in Bitcoin. This week, some are gambling, some are dreaming, and some are hoarding Bitcoin.
The world is a huge makeshift stage, but "Spicy Comments" is here to help you stitch together the most ironic operations, the most absurd money-making fantasies, and the most ridiculous realities.
Wishing everyone a happy weekend!
(The content of this issue is derived from public information and online discussions, interpreted in a light-hearted manner, for reference only.)
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